to cry.

I want to cry.

I want to feel the tears run down my cheeks like small rivers.

i want to see through the gaps of my lashes, the small droplet tumble to the ground,

its body engulfed by anything it touches.

I want to feel the walls of my nasal swell with emotions,

translated into snot, because for whatever reason,

crying must not be clean.

I want to be messy, to lay amongst my mess as i cry,

to feel the world’s ploy against me.

i want to feel like i’ll never breathe easy again,

as my palms shake like thin branches,

my breath as shaky as cold wind.

i want to feel the pain in my chest and then suddenly

nothing as it dissipates with each breath,

until i grab more anguish from my breast

and begin the seance again.